But jokes

One day I visited my friend in a hospital.

I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"

Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.

What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?

Womxn

What does the F in "orphan" stand for?

"Family," but there is no F.

If boys are like sports because they are easy to play, then girls are like a sandwich. They are nice at first, but they're crusty after.

My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.

You can't YEE your last HAW!

But I put my BALLS in ur JAW.

You may have a footlong, but I have a SHENLONG. :)

Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?

Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.

Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.

Have you seen the Justin meme?

Yeah, the ones that cracked at Fortnite?

Just-in time for deez nuts.

Bruh.

But actually, it's a parody.

Wait, actually?

Parodiesnuts (pair of deez nuts).

But you could get plastic surgery and look 20 years younger. With that, no one will suspect you!

When the teacher says she'll call your parents but you're an orphan.

You know I would make a deaf joke, but I don't think they would hear it.

I know this is supposed to be an emo joke, but does anyone want to play Rocket League?

I'm on PS4, by the way!

My name: Box3d_by_Clapped

Yo momma so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the floor cracked up.

I can't walk, I can't talk, but I can drive a wheelchair.

Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."

Off-topic, but why is the picture in the baby category feet? And nasty feet at that? What am I, Dan Schneider?

I thought you were just raising your eyebrow, but I checked the x-ray, and your skull shifted 128 degrees to the right.

Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣

When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!