I think that church is super burning š„µ
To spite Santa and Greta Thunberg.. I'm burning the coal i got for Christmas
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green." "I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship." "You're very pretty for a Purple girl." "We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!" "Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people." "You 2-headed people are so stupid!" "No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes." "Get out of my store you grigger!" "The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.
So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principalās office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principalās office and said, "my buns are burning."
Imagine being named Colby and you burn yourself
A white dad,a priest and a rhabi all run out a burning school and the dad says āwhat about the kidsā and the rhabi replyās to him saying āfuck the kidsā and the priest says āthink we got enough timeā
Why did Helen Keller burn her hands?
Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.
Why was the burnside bridge so hot ........ Because it's on the burning side
Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Alabama burned down? Almost took out the whole trailer park.
My uncle got really badly burned the other day. They don't fuck around at the crematorium.
Johnny had 55 pineapples. He threw three at his friend. How many does he have now?
None because he was pistol whipped then shot at point blank range with a sawed off shotgun covered in fluoroantimonic acid which burned a hole in his skull causing his brain to melt and rupture nerve cells all over his friends. Then his arms and legs were stuffed into a wheat thresher which was used to harvest the meat of the enslaved children. Then his corpse was molested.
why is the sun so attractive? because it is burning hot!
WHAT BURNS UP A FOOTBALL STADIUM??? A FOOTBALL ' MATCH '
Chuck Norris docent get sun burns the sun knows better
God creates a wasp :) God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly. Angel: okay... a bug. God: now give itās face a sword, but it has a hole so itās basically a mouth. Angel: weird.. but okay... God: and give it wings. Angel: eh, not half bad Go- God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS Angel: *shook* o-okay God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out. Angel: .-. God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give āem a taste āo that! *evil grin* Angel: *cries* Angel: *whispers; Iām so sorry..*
Why did the man put himself on fire? To BURN Calories.
you look like barney i Ģm choking you too and your face is turning all purple and blue
I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons~ they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.
