Bone jokes
I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.
Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.
- What did the skeleton say to his friend?
- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...
Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.
Your mom has a bone to pick with me.
Never break someone’s heart, they only have one.
Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
Have a sink in your house? Eat it.
Have a mouse in your house? Kill it.
Have a child in your house? MICROWAVE IT.
...just kidding. Now watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shingles!
What skeleton does Crap-ton of?
A "bone".
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but there will always be something that offends feminists.
Why are you so bonely, my friend? I am at least glad that you are not boneless.
Q: What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? A: A tromBONE.
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?
"Because he felt it in his bones?"
No,
He read the weather app, you idiot.
What do you call a skeleton who went out in the snow? A numb skull!
Skeletons love to be in band. They love the trombone!
You’ll need a bib when you’re done eating my ribs.
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.
So my brother said we should start a band, and I said I already had a band. So I gave him my band and he said he was talking about music, and I said, "Well, I do have a trum-bone ;)"
Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?
Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.
Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.