Birthday jokes
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
I gave Helen Keller an Oculus and AirPods for her 12th birthday, and she hated them and me.
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
Why is September 11th the best birthday?
Everyone remembers it! :)
My wife is so fat! She wears high heels, she strikes oil.
When she sits around the house, she really sits *around* the house. Every time she turns around, it's her birthday.
For my birthday on Sept. 11 this year, I just want a plane chocolate cake.
For my birthday on September 11th this year, I just want a plane, but delicious, chocolate cake.
Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.
A father came to his daughter's 18th birthday. He finally came.
What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?
Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!
Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday!
Yo momma is so old, her birthday's expired.
Why is 4/20 such an epic date?
Because it's weed day, Columbine, AND Hitler's birthday;)
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.
I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"
Wanna know something funny? Well, there was this one time when my parents were talking about their marriage.
Then after the wedding, they decided to make a joke, and then 9 months later, I was born. My birthday (4/1/06) April 1, 2006.
What’s the best way to get people to remember your birthday? Kill yourself.