Bad jokes

Roses are red, Larry is bad.

I'VE GOT A GUN, get in the van!

My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...

So I threw a carrot at her.

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.

Abortion is bad.

Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.

*The next day*

Uncle: F*CK!

This is a bad day for me.

I hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though I think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldn't wanna hurt your funny bone, but I think your starting to get BONELY so I'll stop pulling your leg. Now get out before I give you a bad time.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!

Déjà Vat: the feeling that you’ve heard that bad joke before.

Nobody knows how bad you smell.

I told a joke to an orphan, turns out he wasn't an orphan...

So, I know that there are a lot of egg yolks on this website, and I guess I got beat to it, but I'm eggcited to say eggsactly what the eggs say.

I know I'm bad at this, but I hope you will crack up anyway.

Papyrus: Sans, your jokes are bad!

Sans: I don’t care; I got thick skin.

Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.

Who did Stephen Hawking love more than anyone else?

His wife, "Eye," who was also bad at running.

Why can't vampires tell jokes right? All their jokes just SUCK.

My dog kept chasing people on a bike. Eventually, it got so bad I had to take his bike away.

Teacher: *calls you up to the board*. You: Ok. *Gets intense boner* *has to fart really bad* You: F***!!!!!!!

Yo' mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.

How bad is explosive diarrhea when a Muslim has it? Because my Chipotle blew up yesterday.