I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender
Why was the baby ant confused? Because it uncles were all aunts
Guy tells his pal...My wife is expecting. We're going to the clinic to see if it's a girl or boy. "Congrats man...what are you gonna name it if it's a boy? .... We're going with Trevor. Ok, what if it's a girl?... then we'll have an abortion.
Knock knock! who's there? baby! baby who? do u want to eat this baby that i have prepared? no thanks i already ate.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids. Knuckle babies don't eat.
How do you stop a baby from drowning? pt. 2
-Harpoon it
How do you get 100 dead babies into a tub? Put them in the blender. How do you get them out of the tub? Give mexicans tortilla chips and tell them theres salsa in the tub.
My bumper sticker says:👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?" The doctor replied, "He's going through a Mid-life Crisis
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO" then ran off I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
what has 4legs, than 3 legs, than 2 legs, than 1 leg, than no legs
a baby you cut one off each time
Rock-a-bye dummy in the tree top. When the wind blows the cradle will rock. When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall. Down will come dummy, Cradle and all
What does the man say about his baby sister lydia? "I hope she electricutes herself!'
You know a baby bottle looks kinda like a penis.........also sausage and hotdogs too
What's better than 5 baby's in one dumpster.
1 baby in 5 dumpster.
Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom I’m doin your mom. Yes yours! I first saw her in the Wal-Mart pickin out your drawers. Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen But her ass was lookin good all up in those mom-jeans. I approached her in the checkout line, and said yo baby wassup? She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin at her jugs. Five minutes later she agreed to get with me So we went and rocked the minivan like Giggity. Giggity. Giggity. I was ridin your mom like she was Mario Kart. I gave her a lift back to her crib cause her car wouldn’t start. She invited me in the house, and we started makin out again. How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000! Yeah. She called me Pledge cause I knocked the dust off it. She later made me a sandwich and she cut the crust off it. Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young To be in the bed, butt-naked doin your mom. Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom
Q: what the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies. A: a Lamborghini isn't a very fun hobby.
I approached her in the checkout line, and said 'yo baby wassup?'
