Arms

Arms jokes

Comedian

186 views ·

A blind comedian was asked to do stand up for a hospital. No one laughed at his jokes, so he continued to sing, "If you're happy and you know it..."

The room was full of arm amputees.

  • 4
  • Swing

    53 views ·

    Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms.

    What did Sarah get for Christmas? I dunno, she hasn't opened it yet.

    Knock knock...

    Who's there?

    Not Sarah.

    Sally

    46 views ·

    Why did Sally fall off the swing?

    Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock.

    Who's there?

    Not Sally.

    Pedo

    57 views ·

    101 pedo jokes.

    Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?

    Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.

    Keep it going on lol.

    Accident

    13 views ·

    A woman wakes up in a hospital after an accident and yells, "Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs!"

    And the doctor says, "I know, I amputated your arms."

    Friend

    11 views ·

    I have a friend who has no arms, her name is Suzy. I always tell her this one knock knock joke, "Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" Not Suzy.

  • 0
  • Susie

    848 views ·

    Why did Susie fall off the swing?

    Because she didn't have any arms.

    Knock knock.

    Who's there?

    Not Susie.

    Susie

    82 views ·

    Why did lil Susie fall off the swing? She didn’t have any arms.

    Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not lil Susie.

  • 1
  • Mat

    1 view ·

    What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.