Ares jokes

Cinderella

  • One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.

    (P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)

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    Woman

  • Whenever a woman files a rape accusation, it’s obviously fake. Even the cows at my farm are more likely, at least they aren’t flat.

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  • Love

  • I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”

    – Rodney Dangerfield

    Teacher

  • In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"

    In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"

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    School

  • Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"

    The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"

    Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."

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    Murder

  • A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?

    (Getting brutally murdered.)

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  • Number

  • I see 2 fighting with 3. "What's going on?" I ask. 5 responds: "The numbers are moving on up."