Appearance jokes

Michael Jackson has done something no one has ever done before. I'm not talking about his record sales or tickets sold.

I'm talking about being born a black man and dying a white woman. Incredible!

Your hairline is so far away that even the Hubble Telescope can't see it.

I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.

Yo mama so ugly, when she tried to enter an ugly contest, they said they didn't allow professionals.

You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.

At the funeral of a family friend, I was chatting to June, an elderly lady I hadn’t seen since I was a teenager. I was thrilled when she told me what a beautiful young woman I’d become.

On the journey home, I remarked to my mother how lovely it had been to see June again.

“Yes, it’s such a shame that she’s gone blind,” she said sadly.

Cremation:

My last hope for a smoking hot body.

Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?

A. Ask your mother.

Your face is crustier than the Sahara Desert.

Yo mama is so fat, her car has stretch marks.

Me: What did one toilet say to the other?

You: What?

Me: You look flushed!

Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂

Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?

If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.

Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, what happened to you?

Sometimes I feel ugly, but then I think of my sister and I feel better.

There's something on your chin... no, the 3rd one.

A wild Iceberg appears. Go Titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt. The attack misses. Titanic faints.

Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.

Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."

Your forehead's so big, when you were being born, the doctors thought you had no face.