ANS jokes

Email

  • A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.

    The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"

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  • Orphan

  • When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.

    Me: You f&*k up.

    The class: Oh sh!&

    Wish

  • Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.

    Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.

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  • Orphan

  • A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.

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  • Orphanage

  • There was a kid being mean to another kid at an orphanage. The kid said, "Stop!" but the mean one said, "What are you going to do? Call your mommy?"

    Orphan

  • Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.

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