ANS jokes

Want to know what I do in my freetime?

Punch an orphan, cuz what are they going to do, tell their mom?

What’s an orphan’s favorite movie?

Spider-Man: Homecoming.

What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?

"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.

What is an orphan's favorite naval film?

"Spider-Man: No Way Home."

Why is Harry Potter an orphan's favorite character?

Because Harry Potter has no parents, so it’s relatable.

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.

Why can’t an orphan get arrested?

Because they're not wanted.

If you take an emo kid grocery shopping.

You get to scan their wrists for discounts!

What's the difference between an orphan and a criminal?

The criminal is wanted.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

They don't know where home is.

So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.

The next day I saw a dead orphan.

What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?

Tic-tac-toe.

What do you call an ex-lesbian?

A clitter quitter.

Why did the Titanic sink? Because it saw an iceberg selling candy.

What's the difference between an orphan and Stuart Little?

Stuart Little got chosen!

I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.

What is an Irish kiss?

Fellatio from a gay Irishman.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.