ANS jokes
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
What do you call people who have an Oedipus complex?
Motherfuckers.
You get on an elevator and you find the Pope and Donald Trump cowering from two snarling wolves. In your hand you find a revolver with only two bullets in it... what do you do?
You shoot the Pope and the Donald each in a leg and exit the elevator at the next stop.
A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"
She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"
He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
One day an orphan threw a boomerang. It's not the only thing that didn't come back.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
What do you call a picture of an orphan?
A family portrait.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple actually got picked.
They call me an elevator because I let people down.
What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors? Surrounded by loved ones.
What do you call an orphanage?
A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
"Who's your daddy?"
(Go look up the game)
If you're bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
An orphan asked if they could move into my house yesterday. I said, "Don't you have a family?"
I saw a tree. I looked up, and there was an apple hanging. And then I said, "Wow, that guy is lucky!"
An orphanage is like a horse rescue. You rescue them, rehabilitate them, then sell them for as much as possible.
What is it called when an orphan is having a family reunion?
Me time.
There's an upside to being an orphan; every snack they get is family size.