ANS jokes
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
A guy bought an AMG and crashed it. Now he knows how the Mercedes bends.
What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan? The apples get picked.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
Crit especially if you are a rouge
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hitler blew an 11 country lead, During World War 2.
What do a gay man and an ambulance have in common?
They both take it in the back and go “whoot whoot.”
What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?
The ant knows where home is.
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
What’s an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.
What store can an orphan never find?
Home Depot.
What is an orphan's most hated TV shows?
"Family Guy" & "American Dad."
When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.
When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.
I wrote an essay today about Africa, and I FAILED even though I wrote a perfect rendition of the Hunger Games storyline.
What's the difference between a coat hanger and an emo?
Nothing, they both hang.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
What do u call an orphan that takes a photo?
A family photo!
What does an electric-type Pokémon say when they get gassy while drinking milk?
I’m Zaptos intolerant!
What are two plus sides to being an orphan?
1. All your snacks are family sized.
2. No one can make jokes about your mama.
What's an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.