ANS jokes
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun. Now it’s an assault rifle.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
"Poor old fool," thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink.
The gentleman asked, "So how many have you caught today?"
The old man replied, "You're the eighth."
Memes
What do you call an Asian k9? E10
What is an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy.
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It's not like it can tell its parents.
My friend said an apple a day keeps the orphan away. I said only if you throw it hard enough.
Me: Hey, are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
For a present on Christmas, I gave an orphan a phone, just without a home button.
What do you call an orphan?
Homeless.
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
What is an Italian massage?
An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes.
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.