ANS jokes
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then the lethal dose would be a lifetime supply.
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then half of the least dose would be a lifetime supply.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
Look! An ancient African city!
From the makers of Timbukone...
What is a selfie of an orphan called?
A family photo.
An emo and a leaf fall from a tree, which hits the ground first?
The leaf, because the emo got caught by the rope.
What is a pizza that an orphan can’t have?
A family pizza.
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
A man comes into the pharmacy to get a flu shot. The pharmacy nurse prepares one of the shots. The man gets the shot, and the nurse cleans the shot area.
The next day, the man comes back and gets another shot. Before he paid, the nurse said, “Don’t you realize if you get another shot you may die from overdose?” The man said, “Don’t you realize if you don’t shut up I’ll give you a shot of lead?” The nurse got scared and quit her job.
The nurse was relaxing, looking for a vacation to book, when all of a sudden she hears an odd noise. It sounds like someone cocking a gun. The man was hiding behind the nurses bushes. “In return for you giving me shots, here are yours,” said the man as he was chuckling like a psycho. The man shot the nurse in the leg so she couldn’t escape, then he shot her left hand, which is the lady’s dominant hand, so she couldn’t call the cops. For the finishing move, the man curb stomped the fucking life out of her until her head was as flat as paper.
9 years later......
All along, this man, this psycho, escaped a mental hospital. He went on mass genocide, killing 20,000 people in just 3 years. This man is more than human, more than alien, more than god himself. It was Satan reborn.
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
If an orange is orange, does that mean it's orange?
What do you call a girl who is thirsty for water?
An H2hoe.
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.
Yo mama so fat, when she takes an elevator, it ALWAYS goes down!
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? They don't know where home is.
I went up to an orphan and asked where their parents were--they stared.
Hey y'all, you want to read something funny? Then look up "Greater Tuna" OID and read the script. It's the best. I'm performing it for an OID (Oral Interpretation of Drama) and it kicks ass. Check it out. Also, the name I'm using is my Roblox Username. Friend me.