ANS jokes
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Bf: Do you love me?
Gf: Most of the time.
Bf: Well, it's either yes or no.
Gf:...
Bf: Well, when is it that you don't love me?
Gf: 2:30 to 4:00. Every time when you go to the river an hour, then it takes me a half hour to love you again.
Bf: Why?
Gf: 'Cause you always see that OTHER GIRL.
Bf: MY LOVE! That other girl is my sister!!!
Gf: Ohh...
I told my sister that when you go to bed with an itchy butt, you're going to have smelly fingers in the morning, and I've never heard her laugh so hard in my life.
Why couldn't an orphan use a fighter jet?
Because he couldn't use the homing missiles.
Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...
Man, I love working at an orphanage.
Two kids were beating up a kid in an alley, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
I'm in school lol.
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄
My sister thinks she's so smart. She said only an onion can make you cry, so I brought the belt out, and she started crying.
A seizure is just an excuse for break dancing.
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are picked.
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"
An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"
The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"
Why did the number 5 get voted out of the game in the 1st round? Because he was an odd man out!
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.