ANS jokes
Why can an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree, who made it to the floor first?
The leaf. The emo kid was caught on a rope.
A leaf and an emo are both falling from a tree.
Which one hits the ground first?
The leaf, the emo got caught by a rope.
They never told us Humpty was an egg. A man died then!
Ganesha is an elephant.
Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"
Me: Are you an alien?
Friend: No.
Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
What do you call an Asian chick with dick in her ass, pushy and mouth?
Filipino.
Why can't I get a girlfriend?
Because I'm a beta male simp.
I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.
New Teacher: "I was an orphan as a kid."
Students: "Sad"
Teacher: "Anyway, is anyone missing?"
Students: "Your parents!"
Why does Africa have no pharmacies? Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
An American walks into an Afghan bar. Joke, Afghanistan doesn't have bars because of the Taliban.
What is the best part of being an orphan?
Every bag of chips is family sized.
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!
All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.
An orphan and a homeless man get into a fight, so he yells in a mirror.