Anime

Anime jokes

Roast

  • Me and my friend roasting each other.

    Friend: You look like a baboon.

    Me: Stop talking, you look like a gorilla, so I might call animal control on you and I'll be seeing you at the zoo!

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  • Wordplay

  • A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.

    He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.

  • 0
  • Zoo

  • What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?

    A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.

    Animal

  • There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.

  • 1
  • Demon Slayer

  • My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?

    Me: Demon Slayer.

    My teacher: Why?

    The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!

  • 2
  • Chicken

  • Why did the chicken cross the road?

    Because these jokes are not funny.

    Here's why the chicken crossed the road...

    The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road. The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck's opening and was never seen again... The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said..." The chicken crossed the road...." The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit were full of the chicken nonsense and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day.

    The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller.

    The End (hope you enjoyed, I was bored so I made this shit...)

    Animal

  • What is an animal that kids get for Christmas and can easily give to someone else?

    A white elephant.

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  • Cow

  • Teacher: What does a pig give you?

    Little Johnny: Bacon.

    Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?

    Little Johnny: Wool.

    Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?

    Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."

  • 1
  • Fandom

  • Sans: What is Todoroki's favorite coffee creamer?

    Half n' Half hehe.

    Papyrus: Sans! He's not even part of our fandom!!!

    Sans: Bro don't get so HOT headed about it. Just CHILL.

    Sorry not sorry -sans

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  • Friend

  • So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?

  • 8
  • Farmer

  • A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...

    A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.

    "Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"

    Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"

    "Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?"

    Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"

    "Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?"

    Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"

  • 1