Anime

Anime jokes

Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?

Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!

Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

Teacher: 502.

Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

Teacher: No, you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!

Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.

Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?

Teacher: open door, put giraffe in, close door

Student: No! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.

Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one?

Teacher: let me guess the lion?

Student: No! The giraffe because He's in a fridge.

Teacher: WOW!

Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?

Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?

Student: The gators are at the party.

Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?

Teacher: She drowned?!

Student: No! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

Top ten dog breeds:

10. Dogs

9. Are

8. Beautiful

7. Animals

6. And

5. Judgement

3. Is

2. Cruel

1. Dachshund

What's the difference between a yandere and a gun?

Nothing.

Flip them off the wrong way and you're dead.

Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?

Friend: Sure.

Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.

Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?

Me: Aren't you my son?

Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.

A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”

  • 1

    • What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.

  • 3

    • New horror movie idea.

    The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.

    I had an animal pun contest today. He started off by saying something. I don’t remember.

    Then I replied, “TOUCAN play that game.” He went silent, and my other friend barged in and said, “Don’t you think he’s CHICKENing out?” I said, “Yeah, just stop HORSING around!” He came back with one, and I ended it by saying, “Ok, let’s MOOOOOve on cow.”

    Welp, that’s it.

    Two kids were sitting at a restaurant. One said, "Could I please have some water? I am feeling a little HORSE." The other said, "Animal Puns? TOUCAN play at that game."

    Head of Company: "We need to stop testing our products on animals."

    Consultant: "Why? The shampoo companies do it."

    Head of Company: "Yeah, but we make dildos."