Ani jokes

How many oz of water does it take to screw a light bulb?

None, also what the heck are you doing with water when people in Africa don’t have any?

Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.

It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.

What is the reason for why women never look to the right?

Because they don't have any rights.

Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.

The patient says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say."

The doctor says, "Next, please."