I was at the bar late last night when a waitress screamed, "Anyone know CPR?" I said, "Shit, I know all the letters of the alphabet." Everyone laughed, well, except for this one guy.
What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
So, I was fucking this bitch, right, and I thought I had AIDS.
So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get AIDS. Now what I'm wondering is where the hell does an eight-year-old get AIDS?! I guess my sister needs new friends...
My grandad broke his legs.
To cheer him up, I bought him a Walkman.
My grandma was telling me to be positive, as I was going in for an AIDS test.
My ex is like AIDS! I can't get rid of him.
AIDS?
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
So I was eating this girl out the other day, and I GOT AIDS. How does a 9-year-old give me AIDS? I guess my sister was hanging around the wrong crowd.
We send millions of mosquito nets to Africa; we can save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
Hey ummm help!
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
I get more care packages than Africa.
Q: What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?
A: AIDS.
A guy with AIDS went into the doctor's room unusually happy. You could even say he was HIV positive.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
Time heals all wounds.
Unless you have AIDS, when time kills you slowly and painfully.
9/11 called for help. What did that get? Nothing.
Ads for meds be like: Chloroform, it's Chloroform, helps with itchy eyes. Side affects may include Acute Flaccid Myelitis (AFM), AIDS (HIV/AIDS), Alphaviruses, Alzheimer's Disease, Alzheimer's Diseases (Spanish), Arboviral Encephalitis, Arthritis, Babesiois, Cancer, Unintentional injuries, Chronic lower respiratory disease, Stroke and cerebrovascular diseases, Alzheimer's disease, Diabetes, Influenza and pneumonia.
