Abuse jokes

What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?

I beat both of them.

What has 2 legs and loves to play with little kids? The local priest.

So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.

Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.

Why can't you make jokes about catholic priests?

Because they blow up in your face.

What do you do when you're bored?

I beat up orphans.

What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice?

Wipe your bloody cock off on her favorite teddy bear.

What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.

I raped a disabled child.

I think she's too far gone to repair now.

Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"

What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?

Getting to kill the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.

Look, an orphan, let's go beat 'em up.

What type of file do you need to turn a 14 centimeter hole into a 40 centimeter hole?

A pedophile.

What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?

Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.

You see this guy's sense, bahh? If it was a cartoon, it would be an avatar. Cause why?

Anytime he needs it most, it vanishes. 😹💔

Na only this guy I know say him trouser fat pass his bank account. 😹😹😹

That's if you even have an account. 😹😹💔😹💔💔😹😹

I like abusing orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Roses are red, violets are blue, like my hole, Uncle Bill is making me full, better run here he comes!

Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.

There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends, how hard can you throw them?