Absence jokes
What's the difference between parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back from the store with milk.
What did the orphan want for Christmas?
Parents.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.
What's something an orphan likes but doesn't have?
A family.
Dads are boomerangs, I hope.
Why would an orphan kill his family? Because they weren't there.
Why can’t orphans have milk?
Because their dad never came back.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
Family photo! :)
So, an orphan walked into a store. He gets lost and the store clerk asked, "Do you need help finding your parent?" and the orphan ran out crying.
Why are there only 363 days on an orphan's calendar?
They don't have Father's Day and Mother's Day.
What’s the difference between Santa and my dad?
Santa got the milk.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they don't have a mother's or father's day.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
Why did the orphan water his cereal instead of milk?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
What's the difference between my dad and cancer?
Cancer doesn't leave.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have nobody to call "daddy."