Absence

Absence jokes

Swing

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no friends.

Dad

What do Nemo and my dad have in common?

They both can't be found.

Orphan

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "You're." "You're who?" "You're parents left you."

Orphan

Why did the orphan not get service at the restaurant?

Because it was a family restaurant!

Orphan

Why can’t orphans go on field trips?

Because they can’t get their parents’ permission.

Orphan

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple has a family tree.

Orphan

Why doesn’t the orphan have any toys? Because his Lego figures ran away too.

Orphan

What did the orphan's mom say to him when he got into trouble?

Nothing, because he doesn't know his parents...

Orphan

Best part about being an orphan?

Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"

Dad

My dad left for milk 4 hours ago, anyone know where he is?

Dad

If you spell "swim" backwards you get "miws."

Where is my dad?