HOLY CRAP!!!
Crap with holes in it.
Get it? HOLE - Y?
Worst Jokes Ever
Where do suicide bombers go?... Everywhere.
I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.
Daughter: Dad, what's your opinion on abortions?
Dad: Ask your sister.
Daughter: But I don't have a sister.
Dad: Exactly.
What do you call an athlete who injured 75% of his spine?
A quarterback.
Why can't two Asians have a white kid? Because two "wongs" don't make a "white."
How do you circumcise a redneck?
Kick his sister in the chin.
Addicted, what did the drug dealer say to the dopewhore?
"Damn whore, you're not that addicted when you spread your legs open for any man. No wonder weed is more addicted than yo ass." Lol
Junkyard dogs may be mean, but the meanest dogs are the ones guarding concentration camps.
Why do you tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.
An orphan can never get a call home from school because they don’t have a home to call.
Why did the skeleton have no friends?
He was a boner!
Heheheh!
Ah, see ya soon kiddo.
I'm going on break.
I'll give you some fried snow later!
What animal has more lives than a cat?
A frog. It croaks every night.
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
What do you call chill legumes?
Hippeas.
What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?
A Cock-a-POODLE-Doo!
I don’t believe in reincarnation now, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.
—Shane Richie, British actor
Alfred the Great was arguably the greatest king in England’s history.
The worst? Richard the Goat Fucker.
I like peanut butter and honey.
How do stars die? Usually a overdose in an airport.