FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? By Iona Carr.
What Lonely Girls Should Do By Seymour Fellowes.
Unusual Window Decorations By Rod Curtains.
The Long Walk Home By Misty Bus.
Race to the Outhouse By Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont.
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
Today is the day of 9/11, and we were in class making jokes, and somebody said, "That's sad." I was like, "Why?" And they said, "Today is the day the towers went down." I said, "Just like I did on your mum last night."
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
Super Mario.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Me.
What do you call a rejected guitarist who now lives on the beach?
A sea minor.
The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.
So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"
Rocks rock and crack!
How do you keep a moron in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!
What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?
"Dance to the beet, y'all!"
What do you call a fish with no parents?
An orfin.
People say that they miss xxxtentacion, like the bullet didn’t.
What did death say during a helicopter crash?
KOBE!
He: "I love you."
Me: "I love myself too."
I adopted you. Now say goodbye, you missed your Spanish lesson...
Bomb goes Uno.
I go 7u7. I said I go 7u7. Get Rick and rolled, my son.
Doctor, Doctor, I discovered one of the base pairs in my genetic code is erroneously a stop codon?
Nonsense! That shouldn't be happening!
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team?
Because all of them that can jump, swim, and run are already here.