Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the one behind it wasn't social distancing.
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.
Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy
Morbid jokes are just like girlfriends. Not everyone gets it.
I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop!
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
My girl got mad at me last night for saying to my mom that she had a dildo ready at all times and is always hard, so my mom wanted to see. So I whipped out my penis and my mom said it’s bigger than your dad’s!
VVD [is] better than Sergio Ramos.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
They taste funny.
Biden 2020.
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.
Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"
Slit your wrists.
The next time you get a sack call, pick up the phone and say, "Welcome to Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is next week's sauce. How may we help you?"
What’s black and white and dead all over? My Chemical Romance.
I was gonna tell a joke about a dead fetus, but I decided to abort it.