Worst Jokes Ever
Last night I was watching a Scotland Christmas movie...
And the part when Mary tells Joseph that she is pregnant, Joseph was surprised, and he exclaimed, "Jesus Christ!!!" I immediately stopped watching and changed the channel.
I called the Chinese takeaway yesterday. A man picked up the phone and said: "Hello! I am Wan Kin, the chef." I said that I'll come back later.
Instead of Edward Scissorhands, I’m Edwardscissor wrists.
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, "WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!" A man in the back responds, "YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!"
I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.
How do you get your grass to cut itself?
Make it depressed.
What can you tell [as] a difference between [a] man and a woman [in a] relationship?
Both of them are just full of shit.
What does BLM stand for?
Biden loves millennials.
Yo mama so tall, she was next to Neil Armstrong on the moon.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid sitting on his lap?
"Just beat it."
Lol. It was just a prank, bro.
What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have a touchy feeling for kids.
Roses are red, violets are blue. If you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.
If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual assault?
Why did Michael Jackson run?
Because he lost his glove.
if a toy from Toy Story died, the kid wouldn't know, and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse.
Why are Chinese people bad at baseball?
Because they ate the bases.
Why don't Chinese kids celebrate Christmas?
Because they make the toys.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!
Tell someone to look in their shirt and spell attic. Hehe.