Worst Jokes Ever
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
An emo tried to give a tree a hive, but it left him hanging.
Orphans want girlfriends to call someone "Mommy."
What did the cow say to its udders? "Hi."
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.
Confucius say: Never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid. You lose every time, and you only hurt yourself.
Unless he use Mongolian recurved bow... then you in trouble!
How have you been recently?
Oh, just playing some Rhydon.
What’s Rhydon?
Rhydon deez nutz!
Me: I have lost it.
Random: Lost what?
Me: My will to live.
Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again?
Little Johnny: I had to be there for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints)
George, when I saw your face, I had to shoot you with a Nerf gun. If you died, wimp.
Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed.
When I throw a dodge ball at a person taller than me, it's always a nut shot.
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground meat.
What issues don't orphans have?
Daddy issues.
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.
I have a little John.
I'm illegal.
A fat man meets a skinny man.
The fat man tells the skinny man: "When people look at you, they think the world's starving to death."
And the skinny man responds: "When they look at you, they know why."