Worst Jokes Ever
What do you do when you are angry with an orphan? Hit them.
It's not like they can tell their parents.
What do you call your mom?
My wwwwiiiiiifffffffeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!@#$%
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
"Chairing is caring, folks!"
What's the scariest thing about white people in prison?
How rare they are.
Is Google a male or female?
Female because it doesn’t let you finish your sentences before making a suggestion.
Can we go back to 2001?
I bet it was more fun back then.
Batman: I’m vengeance.
Dad: Hi Vengeance, I’m dad.
Batman: ...
Dad: Son, it’s been 20 years, please let go.
A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.
The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."
A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.
The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.
The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
You're so fat that when you go on a walk with your friends, it looks like they are orbiting you.
What do you call it when you see nothing but pants? Brief psychotic disorder!
Ever heard of iLadies? I laid deez nutz on yo' face!
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
2001, Angry Birds was so amazing. Over 500 people in 2 birds.
What's the difference between orphans and apple trees?
The apples actually get picked.
There are 10 million million million million million million million million particles in da universe that we can observe.
Yo mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.
How many white women does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. To hire the Mexicans.
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."