You jokes
I bet you eat your cereal with water because your dad never came back with the milk.
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
What do you call Adolf Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.
You're so skinny, you can hula-hoop with Fruit Loops!
You're so skinny, you swallowed a meatball and thought you were pregnant!
I prank called someone saying, "SON! IT'S ME, SON! I'M COMING FOR YOU!!!" My friend next to me asked who I was calling, and I said, "the orphanage."
How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change anything.
I am just kidding, you know gay jokes aren't funny, come on guys.
2 7 73 53.
I'll give you time, figure it out.
Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium hooked up last night?
OMg!
Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.
My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.
My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”
Me: Yo, dude! Yo mama so fat when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes!
My friend's mom: Why you bully me?
You're so skinny that you use Chapstick as deodorant.
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
You're so skinny that if I were to put you on a flagpole, you would wave in the wind.
You're so skinny, starving Ethiopians offer you food!
You're so skinny, you probably wipe your ass with floss.
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. Their names were Johony and Papa.
All of the sudden, Johony passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says “911, what's your emergency?” The hunter replies “My son just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says “Ok, now what?”
You know who deserves a medal? The guy who killed Hitler.
After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.
You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.