You jokes
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
What do you call a special needs kid with a motorcycle?
Motor disease.
What do you call the door that is cute and adorable?
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
Q: What's the difference between rape and marriage?
A: With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman afterwards.
In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"
His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."
Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
What's the advantage of being a grade A paedophile? You know it's not period blood.
Do you know why there is no “f” in “orphan?”
Because it stands for family.
In America, you have Pop-Tarts. We in Germany here have Toastbrot.
Are you getting tired of life? Yes? Then call 180 go fuck yourself.
It's not our problem.com That's 180 go fuck yourself it's not our problem.com
Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.
This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"
God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."
Orphan: Can I come over?
Girl: Yeah, but you have to bring your parents.
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
"Hi, this is Dave's orphanage—you make it, we take it."
If ugliness was a brick, you would be the Great Wall of China.