Why jokes
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
I finally know why my brain doesn't work!
On the left side, there's nothing right, and on the right side, there's nothing left.
Yo mama so ugly she the reason why Slender Man has no eyes.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.
Memes
Why do ballerinas wear tutus?
The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
Because from a distance, they looked like hare.
Why couldn't the T-Rex clap?
Because he's dead.
Why does a movie set say "break a leg"? Because they have a cast.
Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because dad never came back with the milk.
Why is the sea salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Why does the Catholic Church have a glory hole inside the confessional booth?
So a priest can give an anonymous blowjob to another bisexual man, or a gay man, or a heterosexual man that has a big dick after the priest hears their confession.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
Why did the man say chickens were lucky?
Because they get killed and eaten.
An old man goes to a church and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18-year-old."
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?"
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish."
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?"
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
Why can't orphans play online games? Because they don't have parents to sign them up.
A little girl being Girl: "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."
Priest: "What did you do, child?"
Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."
Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"
Girl: "Because he touched my hand."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)
Girl: "Yes, Father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he touched my breast."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)
Girl: "Yes, Father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, Father."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)
Girl: "Yes, Father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where)
Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"
Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "But, Father, he had AIDS!"
Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"
Why was Hitler bad at math?
He could only count to nein.