Why jokes

Do you know why God created wars? To teach Americans geography.

Man: What's up?

Me: I'm annoyed.

Man: Why?

Me: I stole my gf's heart.

Man: So why are you annoyed?

Me: Everyone else in the surgery room gave me weird looks.

Boy goes to Confession.

Boy: "What are you doing, father?"

Priest: "It's called masturbation and soon you will be doing it."

Boy: "Why do you say that, father?"

Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired."

"Sir, I'm afraid your son can't attend our swimming lessons anymore."

"Why not?"

"He keeps peeing in the pool."

"Well, all kids pee in the pool."

"Not from the diving board!"

Why can't orphans go on an away trip? Because they already are on one.

Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?

Because unlike the Twin Towers it can dodge.

Why do Mexicans always cross the border in twos?

Because the sign says "No Tres passing."

Why couldn’t most people remember 9/11?

Because it flew over their heads.

why don't emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.

Why do orphans play Minecraft? So they can at least build a home.

Q: Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for their birthday?

A: 'Cause it don't have a home button.

Why did God make pigs before politicians?

He just needed some practice.

Why can't orphans eat a large bag of chips? Because they're family size.

Why did the twin towers complain to the pizza restaurant?... Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and got plain.

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? -- Because they lactose.

He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".

Why can't Chinese people play baseball?

Because they eat the bat.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know why I am still alive for you.

Why was the guitar teacher arrested?

For fingering a minor.

Why are heterosexual women jealous of gay men?

because gay men can perform fellatio on men better than they can.