Why jokes
Why do people who get shot in the head always become therapists?
They are more open-minded.
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
Why are women like KFC?
After you've finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
Why do white people own a lot of pets?
Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.
A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.
The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.
"New around here?" said the bartender.
"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.
Bartender "You can talk?"
Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."
Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"
Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"
The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.
The robot seems to be just like a normal human.
"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.
"The top minds in the world," said the robot.
The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."
Bartender, "What?"
"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
Why did I give an orphan the iPhone X?
Because it is the first one without a home button.
Why shouldn't you make fun of burn victims?
Because they've already been roasted!
Why do cemeteries have fences?
Because people are dying to be there.
Why was the orphan so successful?
When the options were either go big or go home, he only had one option :(
Why can't there be a gay disabled person?
Because a fruit can't be the same as a vegetable.
Q: Do you know why God created yeast infections?
A: So women will know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt, too.
Mum: Why are roses red?
Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.
Mum: I made you.
Why is the number 10 always scared?
Answer: He’s in the middle of 9/11.
Why did the chicken cro-
UM, ACTUALLY, THE CHICKEN CAN'T CROSS THE ROAD UNLESS IT'S UNDER SOME ROOSTER OR HEN SUPERVISION OR ELSE THE CAR WILL CRASH THE CHICKEN, AND THEY WILL DIE. 🤓
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side. Y'all knew this one, fr.
Little Johnny comes down for breakfast because he lives on a farm, and his mother asks if he has done his chores or not.
"Not yet," says little Johnny, so he goes to feed the chickens, cows, and pigs. He ends up kicking the chickens, cows, and pigs and goes inside and asks why he got a dry bowl of cereal. His mother responds with, "I saw you kick the chickens, so no eggs for a week. I also saw you kick the pigs, so no bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cows, so no milk for a week either."
Little Johnny's father comes downstairs and kicks the cats. Little Johnny looks at his mother and says, "You want to tell him, or should I?"
Why are orphans not that good at baseball?
They can never hit a homerun.