Why are graveyards so noisy?
Because of all the coffin!
Why Jokes
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts.
Why can't skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Why did the Down syndrome person cross the road? Because there was a zebra crossing!
Why are there so many jokes about Chuck Norris, but not about Bruce Lee?
Bruce Lee was no joking matter.
Why did the midget not go to bed?
He couldn't reach the bed.
Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?
Because they had a connection.
Why are mountains so funny? Because they're hill-arious! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, very funny!
Why did the carrot roll down the hill?
Because he couldn't stop his wheelchair.
Muslims love to exaggerate, that's why they always blow things up.
Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
Why don't blind people like bungee jumping?
Because it scares the fuck out of dogs!
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
Why are Trump's ties so long?
Because they go all the way to Russia.
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have balls.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year.
