Why jokes
Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?
To make room in the freezer for his special meat.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
'Cause he was stuck to the chicken.
Why did the caretaker of the Twin Towers get sacked?
He left the landing lights on.
Why can't religious women be raped? Because they are taught to never say no!
Why did the orphan get arrested for identity theft?
He dressed up as Batman for Halloween.
Why are drums and autistic people the same?
They both go "uh uh uh uh uh uh!"
Why does Elmo turn emo? Because he's Elmo emo.
Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.
Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.
Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Why did the orphan commit a crime?
Because they wanted to be wanted!
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Why did the child die? To see God, our father.
Why do orphans love elevators?
They raise people!
Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? Their dad can’t wake them up.
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.
Why do orphans hate dad jokes? They never return.