Whos jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
"Can you tie a knot?"
"I cannot."
"So you can knot?"
"No, I cannot knot."
"Not knot?"
"Who's there?"
"F... off!"
Friend: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Short.
Me: Short who?
Friend: Short you!
Me: đ
Friend: đ¤Ł
Knock knock, Who's there? Dad. You came back?
*Ring Ring!*
Whoâs there?
Soldier!
Soldier who?
Youâve soldier house! Congrats!
waHt
Memes
Like if u sleep naked
How do you call on a mail man who is carrying rotten fruit?
Come post!
Did you hear about the young man who brought floral arrangements in the shape of a life jacket on his friendâs funeral who drowned last week?
Everyone was furious, but he explained, âItâs what he would have wanted.â
Whatâs the only plus for someone who burns to death?
They get a discount at the crematorium.
What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?
Driving under the influencer.
What does a depressed kid who loves geometry use to kill themself?
A hypoteNUSE!
Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."
There was someone who slept late... he missed the dream!
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, âWHO THE FUCK FUCKED MY WIFE!â
A man in the back responds, âYOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!â
"What do you call a person who is afraid of Santa Claus?"
"Claustrophobic!"
A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?
The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.
The gay couple was still packing their shit.
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
These people who are offended by rape jokes donât even understand humor. They think of humor as like a happy thing because humor makes us laugh and laughter makes us happy, but most of the jokes that we laugh at are filled with pain and suffering. If I take a joke like, how many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black. Now that joke isnât making light of the fact that people have marched in the civil rights movement and people have been racially discriminated against. Itâs not making light of those, what itâs doing is itâs taking that pain and suffering and making you transcend it for a moment, and showing the absurdity of the human mind, and that is important. Humor at its best takes the bad things in this world that are painful and hard to deal with and makes it something funny.
And before you go in the comments and say I agree with rape, I donât. I hope everybody who rapes someone to have their dick cut off. My little sister got fucking raped when she was six, and the guy is lucky he got caught by the police and not me, cause if I caught I would have fucking killed him, so I donât agree with rape, but I still think rape jokes should still not be taken so seriously!
High school crush: Why do you always look so sad?
Me: My mom is dead, and my favorite grandma, and my uncle killed both of them, and now he's in jail.
High school crush: Shit. Sorry about that.
Me: And my crush hasn't asked me out.
High school crush: Who is it?
Me: You.
Him: Goodbye (as he runs away and never comes back)
Me: Fuck that.
Two gay guys are in a burning building, who gets out first? The one on the top or the bottom?
The bottom because his sh*t's already packed.