When jokes

When you ask your friend, "Can I hear a joke?"

"Sure."

"What do orphans and orange peels have the same?"

"What?"

"They both get thrown out."

What appears over Ash’s head when he gets an idea?

A LightBulbasaur.

Please don't get mad, it's a joke.

What's the difference between a bullet and a police officer? At least when a bullet kills someone, it's fired.

What do you call California when it’s having a wildfire? Completely normal.

Why was the new gamer mad when they were playing Overwatch?

Because gamer girl WAS ALREADY TRACER.

I hate when people make 9/11 jokes, I'm just blown away.

A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.

After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.

“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.

The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”

If you are a bully at a school, when you get home, find an orphan and beat them up!

What are they going to do? Tell the orphan lady to tell you to stop? 😆😝

Ya make 10 paintings, you aren't an artist.

Ya make 20 meals, you aren't a chef.

But when I kill ONE PERSON, I'm a "horrible person" and a "menace to society."

I can't stand up when I laugh hard; neither can they.

There’s a woman cutting onions when her husband walks in and starts crying. Onions was a good dog.

Why were the Twin Towers mad when they ordered pizza?

They ordered pepperoni and got ✈️.

Yo mama so fat, when she went sky diving everyone screamed "METEOR!!!"

What does a baby and a grenade have in common?

They both make a noise when you throw them.

OK, OK, what's up with the fake Gwens? I am going to use a test to see who is real or not.

The real Gwen will know this. When did I come onto this website? Next question, what is my real name, and do I go on cursing rampages? Only the real Gwen can complete this test with the right answers.

When they walk in and you're fucking... everyone at the morgue.

Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?

"That's nacho cheese!"

When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.