When jokes
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my friend was mute she said, “Can't you unmute her?”
What do you do when you're bored?
I beat up orphans.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
Why do they call it emotion when the root word is emo, but emos don't show emotion?
When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.
Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?
I was digging a hole in the garden until I found some coins! I was about to tell my mum when I remembered I was digging a hole in the garden.
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
What do you call Darth Vader when he dies?
A black alien.
Man, my brother has a tight, buttered butthole. The veins in my cock throb when he comes over!
I hate when my father doesn't cook me cocktails for tea.
What does the Gay Garlic do when it gets hot? It takes it's CLOVES off. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Like if you LOL every time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
What's it called when an orphan calls 911?
Operator: Hello, is your family okay?
Orphan: I'm an orphan.
Operator: *bruh*
What is it called when an orphan goes on vacation?
Answer: He's making family memories.
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.
Fortnite is so bad that when you try to play, trash is always in your way. LOL
Your momma is so hairy that when you were born, you got rug burn.
My friend said he wanted to die, and I told him not to jump. But when he screamed, "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass!" I knew it was over.
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.