When jokes

So, when I'm about to take a shower, my mom says, "Take a shower." When I'm about to take out the trash, my mom says, "Take out the trash."

Whenever I have diarrhea, my roommate gets constipated.

When I told him this, he said, "Are you kidding me?"

I said, "I shit you not."

You're so fat, when you step on a scale it says, "To be continued."

A fat man meets a skinny man.

The fat man tells the skinny man: "When people look at you, they think the world's starving to death."

And the skinny man responds: "When they look at you, they know why."

Why are orphans sad when playing Roblox?

There isn't any parents on Roblox.

My BALLS itched when I crashed the plane.

Jo mama so fat that when aliens invaded earth, they said, "Wow, two in one!"

What's a baby orphan's favorite joke?

"When am I gonna see my parents?"

Lmao.

I thought that kid was walking cool when I had my ears shut. It turns out he was moaning.

Yo mama so fat when she stepped on a monster truck she turned it into a lowrider.

When men watch football but not the women's version maybe there.

Yo mama so fat, when she went into an elevator, she had to go down.

What do you get when you cross between Tailga and emo?

Tailighmo.

What do you call when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family photo.

"Meow, meow, woof, woof." That's what animals say to me when I die.

A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.

When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"

God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."

Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went trick or treating on Halloween 2016, the clowns thought she was their supreme leader.

You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.