Wheelchair jokes

No matter how hard I try, I will never be a stand-up comedian.

I left my Avatar at home today.

I never get off on the wrong foot.

Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!

One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.

My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.

Pop in the toilet.

A person with a wheelchair and a football, then they are Rocket League.

What do you call a well endowed gay male who is also in a wheelchair?

Meals on wheels.

Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.

Do you know why people in wheelchairs don’t pay for them?

Because they have to pay for road tax.

Me and my friend have a friend that's in a wheelchair, but he is so annoying, so we throw him in a fire. Now we call him "Hot Wheels."

I threw a kid in a wheelchair into a fire... I called him hot wheels.

"Stand up for yourself! Oh, come on, walk it off."

What do you call a person in a wheelchair?

Anything they can't catch you.

Did you know the Alabama Crimson Tide University has the most handicapped people? You know their motto, "Roll Tide."

I can't walk, I can't talk, but I can drive a wheelchair.

For sale: Wheelchair, one careful owner, no longer needed.

Did you hear about the car that turned into a wheelchair?

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.