Whats jokes
So who did it? the I.S.S. teacher said.
1 hour before:
So let me get...
Random person: Wait, what? You BROKE UP WITH HER!
Me: I SWEAR, JHONNY, THIS IS THE 3RD TIME YOU BUTT INTO MY CONVERSATION! SO... HERE... YOU... GO! *punches*
What is an orphan's favorite flower? Self-raising. 😂
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
What's the difference between Palestine and yo mama?
Yo mama can be found on Google maps.
What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?
A pedophile.
idk what to put here
Q. What does Kenny get when he hugs his mom?
A. A boner.
What does a frozen loading screen and a Make-A-Wish kid have in common?
They both couldn't make it all the way.
A cop sees an old woman carrying two large sacks. One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills. The cop asks the woman, "Where did an old lady like you get all of that money?" She replies, "Well, there's a golf course behind my house and when golfers need to go to the bathroom, they stick their penis through a hole in my fence and pee into my yard. It became a problem because it kills the flowers." The cop asks, "So what did you do about it?" The old lady says, "I get my hedge clippers and I wait behind the fence. When a golfer sticks his penis through the fence, I grab ahold of it and shout GIVE ME $20 OR IT COMES CLEAN OFF!" "That seems fair enough," the cop says, "so what's in the other sack?" The old lady replies with, "Not everyone pays..."
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
A: One of them gets picked.
What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What can you serve but never eat? A volleyball.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.
Question: What did the sun say to the little star?
Answer: Are you my SUN?
What do you call a Mexican Transformer? Optimus Juan!
What do black people and sports cars have in common?
Getting a noise complaint for being so loud.
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office? Only one of them is scared.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.