Whats jokes

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs.

Some people don't appreciate what I do for a living.

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What is black and white and red all over?

... a newspaper!

There's a truck full of babies. What's worse than that? One baby being alive. What's worse than that? That baby having to eat its way out. What's worse than that? That same baby coming back from seconds.

What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?

Joshua Metcalfe

I remember my grandma's last words:

"What are you doing with that axe?"

What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

Error, error, error.

System shutting down.

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? Hot wheels.

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?

Hot Wheels! We'll see him soon.

What did the ball say to the other ball? "You're baller!"

What do you call a person who tries to get you on a dating website... a Brodie.

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

What gets louder as it gets smaller?

A baby in a blender.

When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"

She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD

What happens when two walls meet?

They are cornered.

What's a homo's favorite planet?

Uranus.

Me: Hey, are you going to Sawcon?

Sensei: What is that?

Me: Saw con deez nu...

Sensei: Oh, is it for people with ligma?

Me: What’s ligm...

Sensei: 😈

Me: no no no no

Sensei: Ligma ba...

Mom, am I adopted?

What? No. "In head" No, dah, bitch.

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?

The Virgin Mobile.