Uranus, ur-anus, your anus. Anus is what's in between your two buttocks.
Whats Jokes
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite place in Fortnite? The reboot van.
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
What did the fish say when he ran into the wall?
Dam.
What vibrates and is 6 inches?
A toothbrush.
Two hunters are in the woods and one falls to the ground.
Terrified, he dials 911 and says, “Help! I think my friend is dying. What do I do?” The nurse says, “I need you to make sure he’s dead.” The hunter replies, “Ok, I’ll be right back.” The nurse is startled after hearing a gunshot. The hunter comes back and says, “I checked. Now what do I do?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his heart has completely stopped.” She is startled when she hears the sound of a taser. The hunter comes back and says, “What’s next?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his brain has completely shut down.” The nurse is once again startled when she hears the sound of a bone being crushed by what seemed to be a hammer. The hunter comes back and asks, “Anything else?” The nurse says, “Nope. That’s it.”
What do ants and Michael Jackson have in common? They go in kids' pants.
What did the blind, deaf, and dumb orphans get for Christmas?...
Cancer.
What did one nut say to the other nut?
A: "Candice deez nuts fit in my mouth."
What is black and white and red all over?
Answer: A newspaper.
That is what my 3-year-old told me.
Q: What is the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?
A: One knows where home is.
What do you call an Indian person who is not starving? Dead.
What’s the difference between you and an orphan...
NOTHING!
What do you call an orphan's parents?
Dead meat.
What will die immediately instead of having to suffer torture on the spike of a Judas cradle? A Geometry Dash icon.
Gwen: Addison, I don't mean to be mean but you're really starting to be an asshole!
Addison: I don't know what you mean. I've always been an asshole. That is why people pound me in the asshole!
Kariah: That's sad!
Here [are] some questions firesharky:
1. What color hair do u have?
2. What[s] MY parents['] names? What hospital [were] u born in?
3. What state [were] u born in?
Do not say I don't know.
Lil Johnny's teacher wanted to play an alphabet game, so she said, "What word starts with A?" Lil Johnny raised his hand fast, but she knew that he would say "ass," so she picked on Sally and she said, "Apple." She said, "What word starts with B?" Little Johnny raised his hand as fast as he could, but she knew that he would say something like "bitch," so she picked on Emmanuel and Emmanuel said, "Banana." She went all the way to W. Little Johnny raises hand as fast as he could again, and the teacher thought of a cuss word that could start with the letter W. She could not think of a cuss word that could start with W, so she called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny said, "Wow." The teacher said, "Good job." Then Little Johnny said, "Like wow, two elephants fucking!"
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that does comedy?
Sit down comedy.
Social media after banning Trump from every platform: “Haha he’s so embarrassed that he doesn’t speak anymore...what an idiot!”
