Whats jokes
I love punching orphans. What are they gonna do? Tell their mum?
What do cannibals call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Surprise.
What do you call a group of emo friends?
THE SUICIDE SQUAD!
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
"What did we hit?"
"I don't know, a rock."
What's a shark's favorite sandwich? Peanut butter and jellyfish!
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite movie? Cabbage Patch Kids.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's headstone?
R. I. P. Roll in Peace.
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite football anthem?
You'll Never Walk Alone.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
I went home and I saw my friend kissing my sister. I said, "What’s going on?" They both told me that they’re going out with each other. I said, "Alright."
The next morning, I see my friend kissing my mom. I said, "What’s going here?" They both told me they’re going out with each other. Then my friend said to me, "I gave you 3 gifts. 1 gift, I’m your best friend. 2 gift, I’m your new brother-in-law. 3 gift, I’m your new stepfather." I felt so happy I had a friend that [is] looking out for me.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
What does E.T. stand for? Because he has little legs.
What does S.H. stand for? He doesn't.
What does S.H. stand for? Shit happens.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
What does Stephen Hawking and a prostitute have in common?
They both charge.
I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.
What would they do? Go to their family?
What types of erections do skeletons have? Boners.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Grounded beef.