Person 1: Omg, my blind boyfriend cheated on me.
Person 2: What did you expect? Him to see other hoes...
Whats Jokes
What’s one food orphans can eat?
Homemade.
Me: What are we doing in HPE?
Friend: Fitness.
Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.
I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.
What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.
What did the lettuce say when she is popping the champagne?
What's the difference between Lana Del Rey and Milli Vanilli?
Milli Vanilli won a Grammy.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and Eminem? Eminem was never proven to beat his wife in court, but Johnny Depp was.
What's Juice WRLD's favorite place to shop at?
Answer: Forever 21.
What did the doctor say to the Chinese man?
"Some ting wong."
What’s a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country.
What's the difference between parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back from the store with milk.
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between Kanye West and an orphan?
Kanye West has parents.
What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing. They fast!
I now know what my first tattoo should be, zebra stripes! Not like anyone would know the difference between them.
What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?
A misfit.
What sound did Stephen Hawking make when he died? Power off.
