Whats jokes
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.
What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence?
Udder destruction.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
What did the pimp order at the Chinese restaurant?
He ordered some cock-bang-ho.
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?
steamed vegetables.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a child?
You can’t abuse an alligator.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh.
What do you call a dabbing cow?
Udder savagery.
What do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call those dead pieces of green stuff left in the bottom of a bowl of Caesar salad?
The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them.
If you're ever bored, kick an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?
A: I find your lack of face disturbing.
What's white, red, and screams a lot?
A baby in a blender.
What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?
A sad news story.
Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.
Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't f***ing matter, it's still not f***ing coming.
What does the cell ride to work?
A vesicle.
What was the epileptic chef’s house special?
Seizure salad.
What's the difference between an Al Qaeda Base and a Pakistani School?
"I don't know man, I just fly the drones."
What does Helen Keller say when she touches a basketball?
Duhhuuughhhr.