Wave

Wave jokes

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Ocean

  • What did the other wave say to the other wave?

    "Nothing, they just waved!"

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    Priest

  • A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."

    The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"

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    Ocean

  • What does the ocean do to its friends? It waves. (*Sorry, I wasn’t making any jokes for a while. I was getting sick of this thing.*)

    Toilet

  • Fat jokes and mom jokes😂

    1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."

    2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.

    3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."

    4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

    5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."

    6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

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    Kid

  • Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?

    Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.

    Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.

    Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.

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  • Pilot

  • A blind pilot walks into a plane waving his walking stick.

    The passengers all look at each other in disbelief. The flight attendant gets on the PA and says,

    "Ladies and gentlemen, as you can see, the captain is legally blind, but rest assured, he is one of the best pilots in the world with over six thousand successful flights."

    Next the co-pilot makes his way to the plane, and he is also blind and uses his walking stick to make it to the cabin.

    The flight attendant gets on the PA and says,

    "Ladies and gentlemen, as you can see, the co-pilot is also blind, but rest assured, he is the second-best pilot in the world with over five thousand successful flights."

    At this point, the plane begins to take off from the runway. As it gains speed, the passengers grow tenser. The plane keeps accelerating more and more, and as it approaches the end of the runway, it still hasn't left the ground. The plane is approaching the end of the runway at high speed, and the passengers scream, "Oh my God, we're all going to die!"

    Suddenly, the plane takes off and begins its ascent.

    The pilot turns to the co-pilot and says, "The day they stop screaming, we're screwed."

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    Love

  • Joshua White loves blue, A simple truth, tried and true. In his pocket, only six, Yet each penny a valued fix.

    With eyes that seek the azure skies, He dreams of places that mesmerize. A palette of blues, a symphony of hues, Whispering secrets only he can choose.

    His heart beats to the rhythm of the sea, Where waves crash, wild and free. In sandy shores, he finds solace rare, A momentary escape from life's daily wear.

    In cerulean fields, flowers dance, Their vibrant petals, a timeless romance. He wanders through meadows, devoid of strife, Seeking solace in nature's vibrant life.

    Joshua White, a soul of gentle grace, Embracing the world at his own pace. Though his pockets hold a mere six, His spirit soars, never to be fixed.

    For in the depths of his azure dreams, The richness of life's tapestry gleams. And with every breath, he finds anew, That love is boundless, ever true.

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    Fax

  • An Australian, an American, and a British man are on a golf course.

    They're all on the green and working out their next shot when a phone starts ringing.

    "Terribly sorry," says the Brit, but instead of getting out a phone, he twists his earlobe around to reveal a speaker and opens his bottom lip to reveal a microphone and takes the call.

    The other two are pretty impressed, and the Brit shrugs modestly.

    "State of the art British tech. Surgically implanted. Amazing stuff."

    They get set to resume, but another phone goes off.

    "Ugh, sorry guys," says the American, but instead of taking out his phone, he holds up his hand, taps the palm with his other hand, and it turns into a screen. As the other two watch, the American has a video call.

    When he's finished, the other two are impressed, but the American waves it off.

    "No biggie. Just the latest and greatest in digital communications from the good old US of A."

    Again, the three are about to continue their game when there's a strange, electronic sound and, much to the other two's surprise, the Aussie runs off into the bushes.

    The Brit and the American follow him and soon find the Aussie squatting down in the middle of a clearing, clothes around his ankles, bare-assed and grunting.

    "What the hell..." one of them says, but the Aussie holds up his hand in apology.

    "Sorry fellas, got a fax coming through..."

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    Ocean

  • What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

    Nothing, it just waved. This was the worst joke ever.

    Teacher

  • Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.

    Class: no one stands up.

    Teacher: Oh c’mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *waves her finger around the left side of the room*

    Little Johnny: *stands up*

    Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you’re dumb?

    Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you’re standing alone.

    Beach

  • Wash It Away - By Bradley Lewis(watersharky) and Ben Lewis and Watersharky Music Productions - Why does it always feel like I'm the one that's had a bad day?

    Whether I'm stuck in traffic or showing up to work late,

    Oh this 9 to 5 feels like 9 to forever been working all week

    For a jerk that thinks they can say whatever they want to me

    I'll just bite my tongue for a couple more days

    Soon I'll be in that island sun surfing those waves

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta wash it away

    Finally I'm here and I can't even stop myself from smiling

    Somebody hand me a beer and I'll check the girls on the island

    Don't miss my 9 to 5

    Living like a local on this island time

    I got those sandy toes and nobody knows jump in the ocean and just go with the flow

    I'll miss my sandy toes

    I've got to go back before you know this island is my home

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta wash it away

    Wash it away

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta

    Wash it away

    Wash it away

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