Guys, this has to stop. Let's tell their parents. Oh wait...
Orphan jokes aren't to be made fun of.
They're just aimed at older audiences. Oh wait.
THEY AREN'T EVEN OLDER AGES.
"Uh daddy harder," the orphan said. Oh wait, he doesn’t have a daddy.
My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."
I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."
Ha, orphans are soooooo funny. I mean, they have many family stories. Oh wait...
Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.
We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.
We should stop.
Wait, but who is the orphan going to tell?
The boomerang!
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
My life, but wait, jokes actually have meaning.
OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.
The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is...
Wait, where are we again?
im so proud of my grandpa, he killed hitler. WAIT-
I saw twins. I’m just waiting for those planes.
An old man gets a call from the IRS.
The man on the phone says, “We’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly, and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him.
The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office, and the man there says, ”So we’ve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Can you explain this?” The man replies, ”Well, I will bet on pretty much anything. Like this! I bet you 10,000 I can bite my own eye.” The agent takes the bet, and the man takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says, ”Wait. I’ll give you a chance to earn your money back, and more! I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye.” The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isn’t blind, takes the bet. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. He then says, ”Alright, last chance. I bet you 50,000 I can stand on this side of your office and pee into that wastebasket on the opposite side without getting a drop anywhere in between.” The agent thinks real hard but decides it’s impossible, so takes the bet. The man unzips his pants and pees all over the IRS agent’s desk. The agent jumps up and down and says, “Haha! I got you now!” But the man's lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands, and says, “He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and you’d just love it!”
One dark stormy night when I was 8 years old, I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee. Half asleep, I walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door, I felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically, and the ghostly sound stopped. Terrified, I did what I had to and went back to bed.
The next 3 nights, the same thing happened, and finally, I decided I had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up, I went into my parents' room and woke my mom up and said, "You have to come with me and see this, it's really important." Half asleep, she murmured, "Oh, what is it? Can't it wait until the morning?" I pleaded, "No, you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost. When I go in the middle of the night, I can hear a ghost sound. Then when I open the door, I feel the cold as it swoops through me, and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "Oh, so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."
My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.
I told them, "Just you wait!"
"PENIS WAIT WHAT OENIS SUCK MINE DADDY?" Sorry, you are an orphan.
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
This joke's short just like Joe Biden's penis.
Oh wait, if I were to make a joke to the size of Joe Biden's penis, I wouldn't write a joke.
I can’t wait for collage....
5 min later, ight I’m gonna go kill myself.