US jokes

My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.

It was really heavy on me.

My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.

Your mama is such a hoe! It took her 4 attempts to pass her driving test. She couldn't get used to the front seat.

What is more used than plastic?

Hookers.

Yo mama so fat...

That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!

Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.

"You're the bomb."

"No, you're the bomb."

A compliment in the US, an argument in the Middle East.

"Among Us" is basically a game about betrayal.

My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.

If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.

When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?

Anyone want to join us? :DDD Talk to anyone on the chat :)

Beating the Akatsuki is easy... Naruto should've used painkillers instead. :)

Your mom uses the equator as a belt.

Your skin's so bright you could be used as a highlighter.

Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?

Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.

Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.

Your forehead is so big that the teachers used it as a whiteboard.

"Among Us" in space spells "sugoma."

Your hairline's so far back, I use it as a ruler to measure things.

Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.

Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.

I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.