US jokes
How can you buy emos? Just use their bar code.
My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.
Tazzaro got me like: 😂
Orphans got me like: 😂
"Balls" got me like: 😂
Memes
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
Most of us have been somewhere Stephen Hawking hasn’t: Upstairs.
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
Why can't orphans use phones? Because they don't know where the home button is.
What’s a guy with Tourette’s favorite app to use? Tiktok.
Why is LeBron James an orphan?
Because he doesn't use WhatsApp.
Hey y'all, you want to read something funny? Then look up "Greater Tuna" OID and read the script. It's the best. I'm performing it for an OID (Oral Interpretation of Drama) and it kicks ass. Check it out. Also, the name I'm using is my Roblox Username. Friend me.
Win a free ride in a police car! Just pick up a knife and use it!
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.
What’s the difference between 1000 used tires and 1000 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
You know why you remind me of a calculator? Because 1+1 equals the two of us.
What should you do to prevent dry skin? Use a towel.
What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.