Ur jokes

Grandma: When we go to a wedding, whispers, "You're next."

At a funeral, I whisper, "You're next."

Are you a marry, because you are my mother?

Do you like Imagine Dragons?

Imagine draggin' my balls on your face.

Your hairline is back, people say. "Look at this dude."

Your hairline is so close to Earth, it's 100 million lightyears away!

The average Irish person consumes 131.1 litres of beer, almost as much as your mum at night.

Your mum is stupid, just like you.

You can't YEE your last HAW!

But I put my BALLS in ur JAW.

Ur dad

Omg, I'm sooooo sry!!!!!

What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?

If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.

Your mom uses the equator as a belt.

Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.

He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"

Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"

You're so ugly, Hello Kitty said goodbye.

My forehead blew up because I saw yours at the forehead shop!

Gays, blacks, and your maw, mate.

You're just big and good.

When God said, "Let there be light," He saw your mum and said, "Let there be dark."

Dude, your last name sounds like a seafood shop, Jordan C.!

Hey, what's your age, Jordan? Probably 5 years old.